Bad Date #11

My bad date story had us getting soaked at a street festival, the after we decided to go to a bar so we would at least be dry, he slammed his finger in my car door. He wouldn't let me take him to the hospital so I spent the whole night checking his finger with ice and trying to put a band aid on it. I wasn't sure things were going well but 8 years later we are married.

Bad Date #10

I was a Jr. in high school and my friend wanted me to double date with she and her boyfriend, only his friend needed a date. So I agreed to help her out. We were going to the State Fair of Texas which meant there would be lot of our friends there. When they picked me up I was not a happy camper. Not only was he ugly he had about 20lbs of hair. Against my better judgment I went anyway. The whole night he wanted to hold my hand and put his arm around me. I wore a jacket even though it was hot and each time he moved to the side where my hand was out of the pocket I would put it back in and take the other one out. After the worst evening they carried me home, he walked me to the door and when he acted like he was going to kiss me I ran in the house. Needless to say I didn't speak to that friend for a while.

Bad Date #9

Setup: At this time in my life I had just finished college, got out of a really bad relationship, and was meeting people though Match.com. I was going out on 2-3 dates per week and I knew within a few hours if I could tolerate them again.

I had been talking to this guy online for a few weeks. He seemed super nice, had a good job, was close to his family, what I was looking for. I saw a few of his pictures and he wasn't terribly looking either. So I finally decided to meet him for coffee one evening. A friend of mine, who also was on Match.com, knew I was going out and where I would be in case something weird were ever to happen. We decided that I would meet him at his apartment (this was the first and last time for this) and then he would drive to the coffee shop. When I showed up to his apartment and he opened the door I knew immediately it was not going to work out. Just by him saying "hi", that's all it took. However I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt and go have coffee. So he told me he had to get his jacket (it was in the fall) and he would me right out. So he closed his apartment door and got his jacket while I waited outside the apartment. Um, strike 1.

So we made it out to his car (where he didn't open the door...strike 2) and drove about 5 miles to the coffee house. We ordered coffee (which he did pay for-thank goodness) and sat down to talk. Now, I will admit that I love to talk. I always made sure on dates that I didn't talk too much so I could learn about them as well. I think I am a good listener, but I still like to talk. On this date I didn't get a single word in. The entire time he talked about high school and his high school friends. He shared a story about his 5 year high school reunion and how he didn't want to go so met up with his friends after the reunion and they all yelled at him for not going. Then he rented a limo to go out...and blah blah blah. SERIOUSLY? I tried really hard to stay awake and not think about how much I wanted to leave. Then I remembered..my car was at his place!! Finally after listening to him talk for another half hour our so I finally told him that I was exhausted and had a lot to do the next day. He didn't seem very happy, but took me back to my car. He did email me later, but I told him I was not interested in going out anymore and that I was seeing someone else (probably a little fib there, but that's okay).

It's one thing to share A funny story about high school on a date, but it's another thing to share your entire high school experience and how you got drunk at your reunion that you didn't really go to...

Bad Date #8

It was our second date. The first one went well, I am shy so i didn't say much but we both got a kick out of watching paris hilton die in that one movie. He asked me out again and this time we went to dinner, which was fun, but then we decided to be crazy and sneak into an abandoned hospital on the edge of our town. Now I am not one for crazy, scary, breaking and entering, but i really did like him, so of course i went along...

We had to crawl, literally on our hands and knees under a chain inked fence that had been bent for such purposes. We finally made it under and walked to the middle of the hospital. It was extremely creepy (good chance for the first hand holdage! ;) We were in there for probably 2 minutes when we saw a police car's lights fly right passed us and then a spotlight shine in to where we were. We both ducked down as fast as we could and the light moved around and around and around and finally it was dark again. We jolted out of there so fast!

We got to the chain linked fence get on the ground and crawl part of our escape and I went first. I got my head through a half of my back when i realized my halter top was stuck on the fence! It had ripped it almost all the way off my and bra was just hanging out there for all to see! He had to untangle the mess that was left of my shirt and finally get me out from under the fence. he got under with no problem and we raced back to the car covering up with the remains of my shirt! So needless to say he got quite a show for our second date! It wasn't really a bad date, just a really awkward date! He must have liked what he saw because he asked me out again for a third date and has been asking everyday for the last six years!

Bad Date #7

i decided to go on a second date with this guy - our first date went well, minus the super awkward and sketchy sports bar we met at. he lives about 2 hours away (i know, shouldn't have said yes in the first place) so we decided to meet halfway. we decided on another sports bar type place and thankfully it was better than the first one.

we meet there and sit down to watch some basketball and have some drinks. the first game ends and we decide to go to the arcade section of the restaurant. we are getting tokens to play games and he asks me for money. i'm totally fine with this, however i had no cash as i had spent it while i was waiting for him to show up. we proceed to get our tokens and head over to the games. he then starts playing while i stand quietly (and annoyedly) behind him. finally, about about 6 or 7 rounds of him playing, he asks if i would like a turn....why yes. i would love to play! i play a round and we move on to the next game.

he plays, i stand behind and watch. we move on to the next game and we both play....yes! after a few more rounds of watching him play we decide to grab a seat, get some drinks and food and watch some more basketball. we order and eat. the bill comes and he turns to me and goes (in these exact words), "so...do you want to split this?" obviously, no, i do not want to split the bill....which was all of $26.00, but i say ok and fork over my credit card. we pay and leave. we start walking around and after a few minutes (he was leading our walk) we end up on the outskirts of the mall. he asks where i park and i point in the other direction. he then proceeds to tell me he had parked right over there (a few feet away). we hug, have an awkward side kiss situation and i leave and walk all the way across the mall to my car....by myself.

Bad Date #6

I once had a date take me to the movies. This movie guy wanted to see Toy Story. Saucy choice for a date, no? Curiously, movie guy got a second chance/second date. He arrived to this one sans deodorant. Apparently Toy Story fans find cleanliness optional; never saw movie guy again and I can't hear Buzz Lightyear's voice without thinking of armpit odor.

I also had a first date tell me my hair 'shined like the lights in the Westpoint mess hall.' He didn't get a second chance for another bad date.

Bad Date #5

So I met this guy via an online dating site, and at first I didn’t want to go out with him. I was 8 years older than he was, and I didn’t think that he would be mature enough for me to date (he was early 20’s). Plus I wasn’t completely thrilled with his pictures. Anyway, he seemed like a nice guy and insisted that he was very mature for his age and owned his own home and business. We spoke on the phone a few times, and we seemed to hit it off, so I thought why not. I hadn’t dated much after my ex, so I thought this would at the very least be a good trial run.

First off, he lived about 2 hours away (another reason I didn’t really want to go out with him), but he was willing to drive all this way to meet me, so I let it slide. Well, he was 45 mins late. He did call me to warn me he was running late due to business, but I still had to wait around for this date to happen. So we finally meet up, and he looks way different from his pictures (which I wasn’t thrilled with to begin with), and it wasn’t good.

Then because of our age difference, he started to joke around and calling me “Grandma.” Not really the way to win a woman over. Then throughout dinner I would say something and he would say “Now I could say something about that…ha ha!” Now I think I have a pretty good sense of humor, but I really didn’t know what he was referring to. I didn’t think what I said was funny, or offensive, or whatever. Anyway, so after being called a “Grandma” and being made fun of for everything I said it was time for the check to come. So he gets the bill, looks it over (and it wasn’t a really expensive meal to begin with), and he pushes the bill over to me and asks me to “sign” it. I am like “why???” He says, “because I want to use it to write off on my taxes.” I am like “ok”. Really who does that on a date?!?

So we start to leave, and he starts to complain how he has such a long drive, and he might just stay in town for the night. I flat out said, “oh well, there are some really nice hotels round here, I am sure you can find something decent for the night.” And then I was like “nice meeting you” and dashed for my car.

He called me the next night, but I obviously let it go to voicemail, and then never returned the call.